31
Oct
07

Local Cat Claims Alien Abduction

Momma Cat

NOTE: I recently trapped Shadow’s Mom and took her to the Washington Humane Society to be spayed. The trapping proved a lot harder than I had anticipated, and I was going to describe the whole arduous process here… until I discovered that MommaCat had already contacted the media with her side of the story! Here’s the transcript of her interview with The Cat Tattler…

Cat Tattler: MommaCat, your kittens reported you missing five days ago. Tell us, in your own words, where you’ve been.

MommaCat: I was kidnapped by aliens. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s true. The Tall Ones are very clever. They set a trap for me, put some really good meat in it, and waited for me to walk right in. But I’m pretty clever too. I went in, but I stepped carefully and ate the meat without stepping on that ridiculous bar on the floor. Then I backed out.

Cat Tattler: So how did they catch you?

Cats and Trap

MommaCat: Well, they changed the setup, added some kind of stick, and a string too. A Tall One put more meat in the trap, and hid behind a tree. I guess he thought we couldn’t see him, but he was so obvious! At first my kitts kept running into the trap to eat the meat and the Tall One ran out yelping and squirting the kitts with water from an alien weapon. Then he fed them so much that they lost interest in the trap and wandered away. I thought the whole thing looked fishy… but it smelled fishy too! Quite irresistible actually.

Cat Tattler: So you went back in?

MommaCat: Big mistake. I thought it was safe: the Tall One disappeared into his giant den. But as soon as I reached the fish, BAM! The stick flew off and a door slammed down! And the aliens took me away.

Cat Tattler: What did they do to you?

MommaCat: Well, they stuck horrible things into my body, I know that. They cast a spell on me and made me sleep so deep! And when I woke up, I could tell they had done, well, nasty things to me. They shaved my, uh, you know– and, let’s just say I’ve been very sore down there

Cat Tattler: !!!

MommaCat: And I think one of them tried to eat me while I was asleep.

Cat Tattler: Really?

Ear Tipped

MommaCat: Oh yes. See? They bit off part of my ear!

UPDATE: After a night of recuperation in our laundry room, MommaCat was returned to the woodpile behind the house. As soon as I opened the trap she bolted for the adjacent woods, propelled almost completely by her front legs, dragging her sore hind legs behind her. Three days later she reappeared, hungry and rather testy with her kitts. But she’s accepting food and letting me sit with her as she eats. She still doesn’t trust us aliens, but she likes our food…

OH AND: The “ear tipping” is done on feral cats who have been neutered as a signal to help prevent them from being retrapped and possibly euthanized.


3 Responses to “Local Cat Claims Alien Abduction”


  1. 1 Bridget Nov 2nd, 2007 at 11:29 am

    Awww, Mama! Luckily alien abduction only occurs once. Glad to hear she is back to bossing those kittens around.

  2. 2 EJ Dec 4th, 2007 at 8:21 pm

    My wife and I met you at the Washington Area Rescue League this past weekend when we had our cat fixed and you had shadow with you. I really enjoyed your site and love reading about the little black cat, he reminds me a lot of Maxwell who is always getting into something and actually climbed on the laptop keyboard as I was reading your page. I wish you the best of luck with the cats and wish you and yours a happy and wonderful holiday season.

  3. 3 Marcus Dec 7th, 2007 at 3:02 pm

    Thanks for stopping by, EJ! I remember chatting with you and your wife, and admiring Maxwell. WARL is a great place, and I was so impressed by the facility and good vibes that I’ve volunteered to work with the cats (and maybe dogs too). My first training session is tomorrow (8 Dec 2007) and I’ll probably post an article or two on the whole experience.

    Have a happy, healthy holiday!!!

    PS: If you know anyone who is interested in the unique challenges and rich rewards of adopting a rescued Woodpile Kitten, please point them to BigBlackCat.org. Thanks!

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